There I said it, someone had to, new years resolutions really do suck.
I know there’s people out there that will challenge this and tell me I’m wrong. I do agree they can be a great fresh start and clean slate for someone to implement change, but one thing I’ve come to realise when not just helping myself but so many people in my coaching practice set and achieve personal goals, it’s never been because of a single focused goal or pledge where there has been amazing results, in fact I’ve found this approach to goal setting extremely detrimental.
I know I’m not speaking on behalf of everyone as I’m sure some people really have found the new year to be a helpful time to kickstart a goal, and have stuck with it for a period of time, but there’s a lot of evidence and real life stories about people starting off on a great foot, really motivated and kicking goals, to suddenly lose motivation and interest and fall into old habits very quickly. I was one of those people.
"I pick at or bite my nails till they bleed, bite my bottom lip (sometimes till it bleeds) and even picking at the skin sores because as a result I feel disgusting and feel I look disgusting…which it’s actually a form of subtle self-harm- that's what anxiety can do to you"
Since starting my blog Organised Mess a few years ago, I’ve gone down the path of sharing my experiences and struggles with severe mental and physical health issues.
Although I have been very open and public, even speaking at public and private events as a mental health advocate, what many don’t know is that in addition to battling gereralised anxiety, depressions, PTSD and chrinic pain, I have personally been battling with Emetophobia for over 8 years now and it has impacted my life dramatically. It's this fear/phobia which is the link between many of the mental health issues I have struggled with, as it's one of the primiary triggers for anxiety and panic attacks over the years!
I have a monster that lives under the bed in my own head!
We all do, and to be honest, this one used to scare the absolute shit out of me and have a very negative influence on my life controlling everything!
I decided enough is enough! And one day I made the decision to fight off this monster for good, because I didn’t want to live my life in fear anymore.
Something amazing happened, right at the time I went to fight it off by allowing it to show it’s big scary face, I instead ended up getting to know it and making friends with it. I realised something, it’s not so bad, it’s is actually looking out for me as a friend who’s been with me for every minute of my life, trying to fight off all the other monsters. You see the monster, who I lovingly named the “imposter monster,” through all his experience of being bullied and told he will never be good enough, Is simply trying to stop the same thing from happening every time I put myself out there with such high risk of criticism. He actually ca...